Confession: I've done 'IT' again...

No, I haven't done anything particularly scandalous or sexy. My sin is far subtler - and more insidious. I continually struggle between a relationship with God, and a solitude about God.

Some guys watch sports. Some dudes go hunting or fishing. Others write music or fix old cars...

I think about God... And write about God... And talk about God.
And when I'm not careful, a few weeks have gone by and I haven't thought in God. Or written to God. Or spoken with God.

I have made God my hobby.
This blog is only a stumbling block unless it draws me closer to the One who loves me and knows me and calls me by name.

Don't worry, I'm not sliding into some sort of self-loathing (or self-pitying) funk. That's tired and not very interesting. I just recognize when my focus has become skewed. Like now - time to wrestle a bit.

What do YOU do when you find you aren't where you thought you were, spiritually?

How do you treat yourself?

How do you approach God?


Shame and guilt, or excitement and drive to reapproach the Holy of Holies?

6 comments:

Existential Punk said...

i used to beat myself up with self-loathing and pity. NO MORE! i recognize i am human and it's part of the natural ebb and flow of life. Then sometimes i self correct and sometimes i just continue on where i was at the particular time.

EP

Pickypants said...

Thankfully, I view God as a very forgiving presence. That makes it easy for me to feel better about myself when I transgress, and/or I have not spoken regularly with Him.

It makes things easier, and although it might be a little convenient, I will take convenience in this life wherever I can get it.

On a side note, the word verification graphic is the word mettle. Am I being mettlesome in the eyes of God?

Les said...

Excellent comments. I study a Masters of Theology and find myself often thinking ABOUT God and not learning to live with and trust God and so my anxiety still rises until I realize that I am not casting my cares on Him.

Yes, it is a part of the human condition but I have to be careful not to let cheap grace lull me into complacency.

Chris said...

Les,

You make a great point. Cheap grace has become a more prevalent theme of a lot of Christian's walks.

However, it is really tough to cast all your cares on Him.

Chris

Peter said...

Thanks for the feedback, everyone! Les, I'm glad I'm not the only one!

Adele, I'm trying to get there too, but if I'm being honest, I'm faking it to say I'm completely comfortable with the "ebb and flow" as you but it.

But you're all right - there's grace enough for predictable human inconsistency.

Jennifer said...

Peter! You've really hit on something I have struggled with for months. Increasingly, I have felt that I am approaching God by doing things FOR Him, when in fact, I need to be still and just BE WITH Him, sitting at His feet. At worship, I put together music slides and arrange other aspects of worship. I am the facilitator for a community women's Bible study. And now, through blogging, I am digging into the things of God. But I have to be vigilant about being in relationship with God -- not just doing the things of God. (As you said, treating God as a hobby.)

I'm having a hard time expressing it as simply and eloquently as you have.

One thing that has been of great value to me in the last few weeks is reading Brother Lawrence's the Practice of the Presence of God. My prayer is that I, too, can take all tasks -- both menial and big -- and turn them into living hymns to the glory of God.

I'll be back. I like this place.

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